Thursday, November 29, 2007

Jay discovers

Good morning.

Today's freshly discovered product: Human-flesh flavored TOFU. Yes. It's real. Discovery of Jay. It exists and it's called Hufu. And it tastes like me, like you, you, you, you and you. And you. Yes, like you too. to be more specific, like everything with eyes and mentally capable of reading these very lines. (unless you have a very smart cat)

Fuck, it would be like eating myself. i'll probably need to eat it with a fork, just to know when to bloody stop. It could be quite useful, this Hufu thing. How else could you possibly afford keeping a zombie hamster? or a zombie parrot.

"Polly wants a brain. Polly wants a brain."
"shut up! have some HUFU, stupid parrot!"

it'd make a delightful finger food for cannibals now, wouldn't it? i heard recently that the government of Papua New Guinea was very sorry and apologized in the name of their not-so-long-ago ancestors for eating all those christian missionaries. he, i remember talking about this with a friend last time i was home (and now i'll switch to romanian - it's probably because of my romanian half, sorry for that)

da bå. cik cum pula mea sa iesi frate la vorbitor si så zici: ne pare råu ca v-am mancat. sorii. nu mai facem.
ei bine - zice el - imagineaza-ti-i atunci bå - baietii fericiti cu fetze blajine si cu crucea mare dupa ei - "Come all and embrace the Lord!".
ce-or fi zis canibalii -eeee! ia uite si la åla, a venit si cu protzapu dupå el. parfum!

Hufu. Eat man, man!

ps: hufu's website closed in 2006 because "he world has moved on past hufu, and the
site was more expensive to run than it was worth" - the founder Mark Nuckols said. sad.

1 comment:

silvia said...

băi. ca să încep aşa. eu am o mare capacitate de a vizualiza treburile. şi cănd mi-am imaginat pe ăia cu "Come all and embrace the Lord!", căzui de pe scaun. bestial.